A positive push

A week on since I went to the physio and I'm due back on Thursday. I am still getting a lot of pain in my shins so really need to concentrate on the exercises she gave me. To be honest, after I realised I couldn't do the run, I decided there wasn't any point in doing them. I'm missing running now though and really want to get back into it.

I think because I have felt such a lack of control over my life recently, I have decided to gain some back. So next week I'm doing something about my weight and therefore my self esteem. I was due to go out with the girls this Saturday just gone but declined on this occasion. The reason was because my lovely Step-Dad has been staying (and still is) so I felt it would be rude to leave for a night, but also, a big part of it was how I feel in my skin. I am totally not confident in myself and I've taken a hit since this leg issue. Also I felt I couldn't face anyone after cancelling my participation in the race as I feel guilt about it. I feel like I know I can't do it, but that people won't believe me and I feel I need to justify it which sounds like excuses to people. Does that make sense? So anyway, I've decided I need to take back control. I'm going back on the Cambridge Plan. I have had great results with it in the past. I lost and maintained the first round. The second time I done it, I had a consultant with no real interest in helping or advising. I really need that. I need the motivation and encouragement. I hope I have found the right person this time!

I'm looking forward to a new chapter in my life. I really want it. I want to feel better in myself and healthier. Wish me luck..or just send positive vibes. xx

It's been a while!

It's been a while since I last wrote and a lot has happened in between. Here is a list of runs I have done since my last post:

Date                             Distance                       Time


25/07/2015              Ran 7.03 km                   0:59:00

05/08/2015              Ran 4.68 km                   0:44:48

06/082015              Walk 7.00 km                  2:42:17

07/082015              Ran 5.06 km                    0:43:56

09/08/2015              Ran 5.06 km                   0:44:47

So when on my hols I ran pretty much every other day. This was a lovely run, right along the coast and up through the town and included up hills. I really enjoyed it. I got out really early in the morning before it got hot and more importantly, before it got crowded!

On the last run I have put above, my legs hurt during and worse afterwards. They hurt most of the day, even when walking. The following day I might have had a few twinges, but nothing too bad so when I woke up the next morning for my run, I didn't think about it until I started running. 10 metres down the road and my legs were killing. So much so that I had to walk back to the caravan. 

I was a bit concerned because I have had shin splints lots of times but these didn't feel like that could be the issue. However, I decided to rest them. 

So, I began my rest on 11th August. I got back off hols and still rested. However, still by week ending 23rd August my legs were still intermittently giving me pains and whilst just resting, walking, any time and no time specifically. At one point I woke up in the night and my right leg, (lower and to the left) was so sore that my pyjama bottoms hurt it if they brushed against it. So the other half rang up Bupa who we as a family have cover via his work, and after a triage call, they got me an appointment with a physiotherapist. So I went along there this Monday just gone and she prodded (which hurt), watched me run, looked at my gait,  my foot positioning, strength etc. She looked into my medical and family history and had a general of my legs and a chat. Oddly I seem to have a weaker right leg (pants at balancing, strength not good) and she felt scar tissue down the side that hurts.  My right foot has less mobility and my ankles seem to be weak. I asked her if I should do the Great North Run and she advised against due to the obvious leg pain and the very short time left to the race. So I suggested going for a trial run to test the legs. and then deciding from there. She agreed it was a sound plan and gave me exercise instructions for my legs. 

So, I went eagerly on my trial run and was buzzing when I got more than 10 metres. Even when my back started hurting I was not phased. I kept on. It was hard as I hadn't run for 2 weeks. Then at 1.8 km, my legs started hurting. I pushed on a bit further but gave up and walked back at around 2.4 km. Gutted. I made the decision that night that I couldn't take part in the run on 13th September. It was a hard decision and I feel really guilty about letting other people and myself down. I just can't risk further damage. Especially when we are as yet not certain what the issue is. 

That night my legs twinged a little but not too bad. The day after was worse, as was the day after that. I have another appointment with the physio next week and she said she may get me refered for x-rays to see if there is a stress fracture. We'll see what happens from there. 

So I am going to defer my place in the race till next year. I don't want to stop running because it has given me a new lease of life. I'm fitter than I have been in years. This time last year I couldn't run for a bus! 

So that's it. Bummer! But you know, it's not the end. Watch this space, I'll be back x

how low can you go?

Am feeling pretty low at the moment. Several reasons for it and more keep popping up and adding to it. I have an insect bit on my leg which is painful, and it's huge. About 3 inches x 3 inches. The bit itself is itchy and blistered. James reckons it's a spider bite. I've had it for about 4 days now.

The other thing is I've done something to my arm. The one with the metal plates in it. No idea what but it's so painful it's waking me up during the night. The last 2 nights I've been very close to going to the hospital to get it x-rayed. The trouble is, it's probably only a sprain so if I go to A&E they will think I'm wasting their time.

I've been feeling so poop with it all, I've not been on a run since the weekend and I really want to because I've got a route sorted.

So I'm feeling rough and today I'm feeling depressed. Mainly family oriented and to do with how little, people seem to give a poop. Already had my Christmas get together ideas shot down in a ball of flames. Doesn't help that then I look at lovely Mel's justgiving page which she set up a few weeks ago and she has got loads more raised than me in that short period and I have had mine set up for months. It's not a surprise but it still hurts that my family don't want to bother supporting me. They have not once said, 'good on you for trying to achieve a goal' or 'well done on that run, you did well' or liked a mapmyrun update on facebook, or looked at my blog or anything.

Not a good day today. I'm feeling sorry for myself, upset and angry. Hate days like these.

I have a plan, Stan.

I have a plan. I am going to up my distance by small amounts each run and at the same time think about my pace and stride. I was flying solo again today and noticed that I start off faster than I should.  So I get breathless really quick and can't regulate my breathing.  So I slowed my pace down, took longer strides and I could run further for longer without a break. 

I didn't listen to music because I am finding it is putting me off and I find it hard not to adjust my pace to the beat. I did have a tune in my head the entire way round though,  Let the River Run by Carly Simon.

Now its the summer holidays so my weekday morning runs are no more.  So I'm going to have to either do very early morning or after the hubby gets home from work.

I ran with MapMyRun! Distance: 6.29km, time: 52:35, pace: 8:22min/km, speed: 7.17km/h. http://mapmyrun.com/workout/1079022773

Dizzy with a side of headaches

On Friday  I went for a solo run. Both my Tuesday and Wednesday runs had been cancelled due to waiting in for a mechanic and kids being ill so I really wanted to get a good one in.

Oh dear. Whatever I did before I ran, was not right.  I couldn't find get my breath, I was dizzy and had blinding headaches that I had to stop and not complete my circuit.  Very disappointed.

I ran with MapMyRun! Distance: 4.00km, time: 37:00, pace: 9:15min/km, speed: 6.49km/h. http://mapmyrun.com/workout/1076597437

Sorry! Busy busy busy

Apologies for the delay in new posts. It seems that life has been mad. so, here is a catch up of my runs:

17/06/15 - 5.11 km
24/06/15 - 5.04 km
28/06/15 - 5.02 km (solo)
07/07/15 - 5.03 km

Going out on Sunday morning and hopefully will get a solo one in between now and then. Am going to start pushing the distance up each week. I've started incorporating some sprinting in to the runs, at the end. Also, I've been missing a trick. I usually start running, can't breath so take asthma pumps, then it takes a while for my chest to open up and I'm fine. However on the last run I took some ventolin before I started running and didn't get the usual problem.

Also, I've decided to do the Stockton River Rat Race next year. It's 10 km running, obstacles, swimming etc. m actually excited about it. Not terribly excited about the GNR though..

Not today thank-you!

No exercise for me today. The pollen count is high and boy I can really feel it. My asthma is really playing me up today. So a rest day for me. in the mean time, here's a very handsome man: